| You saw how
the Newlyweds ended, didn’t you? No matter how cute Nick Lachey
and Jessica Simpson looked together, it still wasn’t enough to
keep the marriage from falling apart. That lesson should therefore
stick on all your minds – the idea of being able to spend time
with each other 23/7 may be terribly attractive at the start but
that’s not enough to build a foundation for marriage.
If your sole reasons for proceeding with marriage
are your lack of time together – you’re still in college, studying
for the board exams and he’s busy working his way up the career
ladder – I’m afraid that those aren’t enough to ensure that
your marriage isn’t doomed to failure, just like many others.
There has to be more behind your desire for
marriage. Both of you must genuinely feel that you’ve reached
that point in life when it’s time to grow and both of you want
to grow with each other.
Now, if you feel you’ve all the love, trust and faith you need
to make a marriage work then get ready for the next set of obstacles
– adjusting to the reality of living with someone else. Even
if you’ve already been living together for some time, you’ll
both realize that things would still become different when you’re
married.
For one, the commitments you and your have
are about to get messier than ever. If one of you commits to
attending a social occasion, you’d like to make an impression
of togetherness on your family so you’d insist that both of
you attend the occasion. But what if one of you isn’t unavailable?
And so you’ll be having your first fight. To
avoid such an incident from occurring, it’s essential that you
don’t automatically assume your partner has the power to adjust
his schedule around yours all the time. Before committing to
anything in behalf of your partner, make sure that you consult
your partner first. Remember, in a marriage, both of you are
in equal footing – no one is higher or inferior to the other.
During the first few months of marriage, it’s
also imperative to give yourselves time to adjust with the newness
of the situation. One of you might like to sleep with the lights
on while the other is only able to rest in complete darkness.
In situations like these, it’s important that both partners
are willing to compromise. Compromise is usually the only reason
why most marriage survives so if you want yours to work, be
prepared not to have your way all the time. |
